Being Aware of Resistance
Specific barriers exist to recovery and transformation. These barriers inhibit or even stop a person's healing and transformation from knowledge to wisdom. While resistance is a normal part of the change process, it can stop you from transforming your life unless understood adequately and appropriately. Resistance is primarily a psychological process whereby your unconscious program resists or attempts to prevent any new knowledge or information that differs from its inherent structure from being considered or accepted for implementation by the individual.
The first step in moving past your resistance to change is awareness. It is vital to your process and progress in transformation that you know that you are resisting change, resisting what you need to think and do to change, and, as a result, engaging in self-sabotage. Knowing how you resist change helps you move past your resistance and continue your recovery and transformation. When we adequately understand resistance, we can use it to help us continue to change and ensure the change is permanent.
Below are four prevalent, detrimental, and even harmful forms of resistance that can stop your efforts to change and transform your life. These forms of resistance are thought patterns that operate or function in your mind. However, they can be changed and transformed.
Impatience: Impatience is one of the most common and powerful forms of resistance. It occurs when a person wants the rewards or destination of the change process but wants to do something other than the specific work necessary to achieve a state of wisdom. Impatience is based on a solid allegiance to immediate or instant gratification as a way to live life. The solution is to practice patience in all of your daily affairs.
Not following Suggestions: Suggestions are ideas or thoughts from another person designed to assist you in your journey from knowledge to wisdom. Resistance occurs when you do not accept or openly refuse to consider the ideas and thoughts given by another individual to help you successfully travel the road from knowledge to wisdom. The solution is to follow all of the suggestions of your therapist and sponsor without question.
Procrastination: Procrastination is a powerful form of resistance in that the individual constantly puts off doing what he knows he needs to do for his well-being and transformation. Procrastination is continually avoiding the vital work necessary to change one's life. One place where procrastination has shown up is with the implementation of the Daily Health Plan. Procrastination is about believing that you do not deserve the change and transformation. The solution is to know or be aware that you are procrastinating but do what you resist anyway.
Creating Excuses: Excuses are seemingly compelling thoughts and ideas that stop a person from doing the work of transformation. Excuses will initially appear to the person as valid reasons to do or not do something another person has suggested to help them transform their lives. Excuses are used to stop a person from carrying out his Daily Health Plan. The solution is when you become aware of the excuse preventing you from doing what you initially planned, do what you had initially planned.
While it is essential to occasionally ask yourself if you are resisting change, if you think you might be resisting the work necessary to transform your life in a healthy way, it is equally important to ask another person. While it is essential to have this insight yourself, you may also want to ask your therapist or a trusted critic if they detect any resistance patterns you may be running or using to avoid change. Sometimes, another person can see our "blind spots" much better than we can and, in the process, help us to move past them.
Dr. Harry Henshaw
Loving yourself is the only solution
Loving yourself is the only solution to addictive behavior and mental health issues. To change and transform the current trajectory of a person's life, to end an individual's addiction and dependency upon drugs and alcohol forever, and to find an actual resolution to mental health problems will require that the individual learn how to authentically respect, approve, accept, acknowledge and eventually come to love himself just as he is now, in the present moment.
Learning what loving himself is all about and bringing the knowledge of self-love into his life will give him true wisdom and genuine happiness. Experiencing authentic self-love is simple but requires commitment and dedication to transformation. The individual will need help from others and, as a result, must be open and willing to accept and follow all of the suggestions from others who know about and live the principles of transformation.
To transform himself, the individual will need to learn the knowledge necessary to transform and practice it daily to experience and bring the wisdom of self-love into his life. An individual can transform only if he changes his negative thinking about himself, especially his thinking about his perceived value and worth as a human being, into that which is authentically positive. Any negative ideas, thoughts, beliefs, or considerations about oneself must be given up absolutely and replaced with positive ones.
When a person comes to think and believe positively about himself, he will come to think and believe that he is perfect, whole, and complete, that he genuinely matters, that he is good enough, that he is enough, just as he is in the present moment and will cease all self-harm. When a person comes to think positively about himself, he will come to love himself authentically, he will no longer have a desire or need to use drugs or alcohol or feel depressed, anxious, and worthless, and he will be accepting and approving with who he is in the present moment, in the Now. As stated above, self-approval and self-acceptance are the keys to genuine self-love.
Dr. Harry Henshaw
Cause of Addictive Behavior
The actual cause of drug and alcohol addiction, addictive behavior, is a thought or belief. The exact cause of an individual's addiction or dependency to drugs and alcohol and many, if not most, mental health problems is that the individual thinks and believes that he is not good enough or less than others, and as a result, there is a lack of self-love due to his negative thinking about his value and worth as a human being.
When a person believes that he is fundamentally not good enough, referred to here as his core or self-limiting belief, he will continually engage in self-destructive or self-sabotaging behaviors that will support, reinforce, and even validate his negative thoughts and beliefs about his perceived value and worth as a human being. What a person thinks and believes about himself will affect, if not determine, how he feels about himself and how he treats and behaves toward himself.
As a result of his negative thinking about himself, he will also source or attract specific dangerous experiences and substances into his life, including and especially drugs and alcohol, that will not only validate his perception of himself but will harm, if not eventually kill him if he continues with that type of behavior. The cause of a person's addiction to drugs and alcohol is in his mind, his mental health, psychology, and thinking, especially in his thoughts and beliefs about himself and not in his body!
Drugs and alcohol are not the real problem; they never have been. Drugs and alcohol are merely symptoms and instruments a person uses to inflict self-harm. More precisely, I believe that drugs and alcohol are simply the instruments that someone uses to self-execute. The actual cause of drug and alcohol addiction is the belief that I am not good enough, inadequate, and do not matter. This principle applies to all other addictive behaviors, including gambling, food disorders, porn, and sex addiction, as well as many, if not most, of the mental health disorders.
Dr. Harry Henshaw
